Home > A Brave New Yo-Yo > Thank You, President Obama . . . From a Capitalist

Thank You, President Obama . . . From a Capitalist

Obama Official Photo

I just realized that, as a dedicated Capitalist, I owe you, President Obama, a huge debt of gratitude for all you do for Capitalism.

All too often we focus on our differences, when, in fact, we have so much in common.   For example, how Free Markets and the scientific consensus on Darwinism overlap on belief in the “Survival of the Fittest.”

Thank you for thinning the herd and eliminating hundreds of millions of my potential competitors.

22,400,000 Unemployed & Underemployed Citizens

89,445,000 Citizens Not in the Labor Force

8,803,335 Citizens Collecting Disability

And the idea of using massive government student loans to quarantine so much talent and intellect, first in academia, then in civil service — Brilliant!

Thank you for preserving markets while neutering competitive productivity:

47,525,329 Citizens Collecting Food Stamps

8,010,000 Citizens Collecting Social Security Checks

4,375,022 Citizens Collecting Welfare Benefits

99 Weeks of Unemployment Benefits

We all know that dependence on government — from Solyndra to the Obama Cell Phone Lady — effectively stifles incentive and, therefore, potential competition.

Thank you for turning a blind eye to the exploitation of the little guy so that businesses can set a course of rapacious growth.

I am heartened by the successes of the Robber Barons of our times, like Google, General Electric and Bank of America, who suck up government favors and taxpayer bailout dollars, while sneering at regulations, tax laws, individual privacy and intellectual property rights.  Carnegie, Rockefeller and Vanderbilt would be proud.

And a special kudos for doing what Republicans can only dream of doing — exempting nearly half of all U.S. Citizens (47%) from the 16th Amendment.

Your deft playing of political Three Card Monte by demagoguing the rich to pay their fair share has left untold billions of in the hands of those who actually worked for their paychecks.  Please keep up the good work until we reach 100%.

Sure, there is a price to be paid for your policies in economic stagnation and massive public debt, but we understand — what do you call it, an “investment” — is necessary for our ultimate success.

After all, Capitalism is like an STD virus.  It can never be “cured” with any amount of government laws, regulations or force, as evidenced by the drug cartels.  It can never be eradicated by massive academic inoculations of Marxism.  It will just lie dormant until the time is right for an outbreak, as evidenced by the fall of the Soviet Union.

We Capitalists are lucky in that we do not have to embrace or hold irrational beliefs in foolish ideologies to fuel our patience.  We have human nature on our side.  Like rust, we will endure, prevail . . . . . and profit.

Thank you, Mr. President.

Categories: A Brave New Yo-Yo
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